I wonder if people who are about to die have some sense of impending doom, some ‘knowingness’ that they are about to die. Just before my father died of a massive heart attack he called my mother, whom he had not talked to in almost twenty years, to wish her a happy birthday, which was the next day. Within an hour of that phone call my father was dead. He also called both of my sisters but failed to call either myself or my brother.
But I still wonder, did he somehow ‘know’ or sense that he was going to die. He had had some tests done on his heart only the week before and was to get back the result the following Monday.
I wonder this because today I am feeling that feeling of impending doom. I feel I am going to die or something like that. No, I would have to say that I really feel I am going to die. Now, I have had this feeling many times before and, of course, I did not die. But this time seems to feel different; I do not feel any resistance to the idea of my immediate demise. In the past there was some resistance to the thought of my immediate death, but today I actually feel that I would welcome it.
Maybe this is because I am depressed, which I could make an argument for, or maybe it is because I am more ‘mature’ than I was before and recognize this ‘sense’ as only a thought. Yea, maybe I am just experiencing some depression. I feel ‘trapped’, which, of course, is only a product of my ways of thinking, but I still feel that way. I am trapped in a sense of I do not know what I want, or if I know what I want I only want it bad enough for a short time to do something about it. My deeper desires I don’t know how to satisfy or if I have an idea on how to do that I don’t have the stamina or drive to actually work on the ‘how to’ part of it. Silly me…
So I am probably depressed and would welcome a quick and painful death. Opps, did I say ‘painful’ death? I did…maybe because I like drama.
I have found that there is some truth in this “The Secret” stuff that says we manifest what we focus our minds on. Could I be manifesting my impending doom just by thinking about it? I don’t know, but because I am a scientist of the spirit, I am writing this down just in case something happens to me today and then you will know that people do ‘sense’ their impending doom.
And if I am wrong, I will see you tomorrow…and part of me is kind of hoping that I am wrong so I guess I really do not want die that much after all.
Impending-doom; I feel this a lot from time to time. However it is funny that I think totally different than you do. When I feel this heavy feeling of doom without any cause to be feeling this way. I go to the doctors a lot and if something was wrong I am sure they would catch it. But the thinking behind my feelings of doom are. . . what could be wrong, is someone I love sick or suffering? Than I start praying for who ever I feel is sich or having a hard time, and most of the time I give them a call. I always pray asking God if there is anyone I know or that are close to me that needs help, please bless or heal them and alway in your will. (Speaking or Gods will) Before long the dread like feeling goes away.
ReplyDeleteIt is funny that I never think of myself, and it is the self that most tend to feel for. "Self-Preservation".
When you talk of your father in the first paragraph, I immediately thought, "Oh he was having a Premonition" instead of "impending-doom. Impending doom, or thoughts of Self-preservation are thoughts from the psyche, which means, "analyze beforehand" or to prepare (oneself). Impending doom I feel falls in with thoughts from the Psyche, an animating essence or principle held to be inseparably associated with life. Doom being a judgment, or sentence; a judicial comdemnation or sentence, Ones fate or destiny.
Now, premonition I feel is given from the part of the brain that forewarns us that something is about to happen. Our higher self that peeps out just before we are about to depart from this form of life.
However when you say that we manifest what we focus our minds on, is a truth. And I know it is totally possible to be able to manifest what we set out minds to. We manifest illiness, we even manifest what we look like, we manifest rich or poorness.
I learned this from you Jim. The statement you made below:
"I am trapped in a sense of I do not know what I want, or if I know what I want I only want it bad enough of a short time to do something about it."
Don't we set our own traps? A divice from out minds to keep things out, to keep people away, to shout out our joy. Fear, What is your apprehensive for not going after what you WANT. We set our own traps and imprison ourself.
My problem is I know what I want, but it involves other people. I just have to find out what I want for myself only and other's will come.
Beonca (beonca.bouvier@gmail.com) Phone number 619-600-9850